Wow, the COP15 couldn’t stall my emotions.
Things I did today:
* got nice hot pink nails (love, love, love)
* walked around
told my ex i love him still yes, truly.
* felt the world roll by without me…
* wanted to walk into a busy highway but caught myself when the headlights of an incoming vehicle shook me to my senses (apparently, the feeling’s real).
* ended up stranded, waiting for a friend outside a grocery next to the place we were meeting in.
* got fetched by a new friend who offered me a ride home, words of consolation, a promise of 365 days of cooking—-because these feelings need to add flavor to life and life is no good without the grub!
* got home, ate a quick dinner and put on the happy bob dylan shirt
* went to Happy Mondays @ Mag:net for the first time. Perhaps next time i ought to read some poetry because now’s the time…and words really fill a void.
* was recognized by the guy playing the harmonica but then my margarita (which was too strong for any sane human being!) started giving me trouble.
* remembered how much i hated alcohol.
* got whisked off to eat some braised beef with rice and siomai…all for two dollars or so. Not bad, not bad.
* went home before 12, less angry, less upset.
* went to greet mum and finally admitted just how lonely i’ve been lately
* she was going to take me to Melbourne this month !!!
* my mother, the crazy woman i love so fiercely, gave up the first vacation we’ve had planned for years, nay, the first vacation she’s ever been on since she turned fifty a good five years ago—-just cause i finally decided i wanted my eye removed. incredible.
* got a hug…the most real one today.
* cried some more
* how often do we get to cry in front of our parents when we’re adults?
* will shower in 10 then figure out what to do next.
* meanwhile, it’s great to be alive—heartbreak and all. it’s really pretty awesome!